Allison

Allison

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7 Ways To Respond When You’re Ghosted

Make Sure You’ve Legitimately Been Ghosted

Although some ghosting cases are clear as day, as in your “What do you want to do tonight?” text goes unanswered for weeks, others can be a little cloudy. Like maybe it goes from texting a few times a day to every other day, or long messages go to short one-word answers ― neither of which are fun and can lead you to freak out. But if you're dealing with that particular scenario, don't immediately assume you're being ghosted; it could just be that they person you're seeing is having a family emergency and they don't want to get into it at the moment. Basically, before you call it ghosting, you want to make sure that that’s what it is and not something that else. No one wants to be accused of ghosting, when they're not a ghoster.

Call Them Out On It

In the one time I was ghosted, I called him out on it. After a couple weeks of trying to get in touch with him and being completely and totally ignored, I called him out on it ― via text, email, Twitter, and Facebook messenger. I wanted him to know that I knew what he was doing, and that it was cowardly, sh*tty, and wrong. Of course I didn’t get a response, but at least I was putting it out there and felt better by letting him know that I knew what he was up to.

Cease All Attempts At Contact

This is the hardest one to do, because I know you want to drown them in hate texts, angry emails, and even sit on their front stoop declaring to everyone who walks by, “A ghoster lives here! An evil, jerk face ghoster lives here,” but don’t do it. As much as it may be difficult, you want to take the high road as much as you can. You don’t want to ever give them a reason to think that them ghosting you was a good idea.

Delete Everything Related To Them

Since technology is essentially to blame for this behavior, then technology is the first place you should go to rid yourself of them. Block their number, set their email address to spam, unfriend or block them on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram, and remove them from your contacts on whatever other apps you’re connected on ― all of it. You’re not just doing this so as to prevent yourself from reaching out and having the last word (which you will over and over again), but should they decide they want to be an adult and break-up properly or, even worse, have you in their life again, you don’t want to give them that opportunity.

Do Not Blame Yourself

Unless, as I mentioned above, you killed their cat or lit their house on fire, then you can’t fault yourself for their behavior. Don’t even waste your time trying to figure out what you did wrong, what you could have done differently, or anything that puts the blame on you. It’s not your fault that they’re immature, weak, and don’t have the ovaries to say to your face, like a damn adult, that they’d like to end things.

Be Grateful They’re Gone

You need to be sooo effing happy that they’re gone. You need to drink champagne, cheers your awesome life, and your even more awesome future with them. Someone who ghosts is someone you do not want in your life. If they can’t even breakup with someone properly, what else can't they do properly? You dodged a bullet when they ghosted you, so celebrate like crazy.

Have Yourself A Giggle

I cannot stress enough how important it is to laugh at all this, once the shock, anger, and hurt have subsided, of course. Anyone who thinks ghosting is the best way to deal, or rather not deal with ending a relationship is a total a**hole who deserves to be laughed at, mocked, and ridiculed. So go ahead and have yourself a giggle, a laugh, or a delightfully wicked cackle. If this were a competition, you would have won, and winners always get the last laugh.


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